![cjones05152016[1]](https://mlegrd0d2dsc.i.optimole.com/cb:6jfX.43614/w:auto/h:auto/q:mauto/f:best/https://madisondems.org/wp-content/uploads/2016/05/cjones051520161.jpg?w=604)
Category: Satire (Page 2 of 7)
From the producers of “The Producers,” #Trumped starring Matthew Broderick, Nathan Lane, Cloris Leachman and Donald J. Trump
By Mark Fiore
It seems only fitting to use Antonin Scalia’s own words for a poetry slam, since the justice’s snarky dissents are filled with so many poetic gems. The Affordable Care Act victory was followed quickly by the same-sex marriage win, and Scalia’s dissents have become increasingly irate and colorful.
Turns out, trying to bring health insurance to millions of people in the United States is not illegal and neither is letting two people who love each other get married. Go figure. Once the fulminating conservatives cool off, hopefully health insurance and marriage will become boring again and we’ll look back on this and laugh.
Though Scalia had some wins this Supreme Court term, it’s fascinating to see how unhinged he becomes in his dissenting opinions. Amazingly, he even dissented while concurring! As a cartoonist, I love this guy. As a citizen, not so much. Enjoy your Obamacare, go get married no matter who you love and be sure to enjoy the sputtering frustration of Scalia. Oh, and check out the stories behind this cartoon!
WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—In what is being hailed as a rare example of bipartisan coöperation, Senate Democrats and Republicans came together today on a near-unanimous vote to defund Sen. Ted Cruz (R-Texas).
The measure, which shuts down all nonessential functions of Sen. Cruz, passed by a margin of ninety-nine to one.
As the final vote was announced this morning, Sen. Cruz’s microphone was unplugged and the Senate exploded with cheers on both sides of the aisle.
Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid (D-Nevada) said that the vote to defund the Texas senator showed that bipartisan cooperation is possible even in the usually rancorous Senate: “Every now and then the two parties can reach across the aisle and find something that we both despise with all our might.”
Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell (R-Kentucky) acknowledged that the budget impact of defunding Sen. Cruz would be minimal, but added, “This was never about money. We got Ted Cruz to stop talking, and you can’t put a price tag on that.”
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